The One
by Ruka Jaganshi
Summary: Haruka tells a story about her... romance from the age of Silver Millenium. About Rubeus.


Hi Konekos!

I am Haruka, in case you were not able to determine it at the first moments of our permanent contact. You know, that very kakkoi tomboy whose simple mention can mesmerize many of you. Not that I mind it, what's more: I love you and I love that intact, admiring glitter in your eyes whenever you are talking to me. But that's not the reason I put fingers on keyboard. I intend to tell you a story. Not exactly to amazedly listening glances gathered around me; just this once I don't mind if you laugh at me or similar, for I decided to tell about my only, wild and fuming, maybe a little blind passion on my own will.

Surely, you all know the Daughter of the Seas, that's why her wise smile and her always calm and calming presence probably appeared before you by now. Well, she was the one who has cooled down the wish that consumed my entire life, whispering on dreamless, idle nights: it's not over. _He_ is still waiting for you over there. Go after him and your wild romance shall continue.

Michiru was the one to show me that I have to believe: I came too late for _Him_.

I'll never, never forgive her that. Not her and not him.

However, I'm being a little too precipitate. Let us stay at the beginning, in a slightly more peaceful world of my memories.

With a tiny mincing of matters, my life could almost be called peaceful during the years of Silver Millenium when I was raised on my home planet Uranus, however spending most of my time running away to the swarming world of Earth. There lived much more interesting people than on any other planet of this Solar System, so it's small wonder that most princesses of our age gathered here in their free hours, longing for gossip, adventures, princes and other valiants with lower ranks. Everyone to their own taste.

I personally was longing for freedom, nothing else. No, my sweetest dreams weren't filled with beautiful women at that time; I was dazing them with gentle words and playful looks only for the amusement of myself and my close friends who knew my secret. And for the annoyance of my fiercest enemies: the members of The Male Gender.

I don't say I wasn't prepossessed at their judgment and I don't say I _am_ not. Be it said in my favor that my father and his servants were all unfeeling, rude bastards; they raped the housemaids regularly, and I was only spared because of my royal blood, although I strongly doubt that my father would have done anything against it when they'd have taken the risk. They chased my mother into death when I was a few years old… but this is another deadly boring story, so I skip over it now. However, I really don't know what preserved even a drop of tenderness, feeling or cheerful thought in me after her death. Probably the knights of the earthly palace; they astonished me with their velvet clothes and gentle words to the ladies quite much when I first saw them. It surprised me that they were fighting against each other for the favor of the princesses instead of for money and other goods, and that the victorious one was not the one with the sturdiest giant with the heaviest armor but the most devoted Romeo.

I had to see later that this was not everything. In other parts of life, women were totally disregarded: they weren't allowed to play cards, make decisions, inherit and have weapons. And there was a third part where men compared their strength with swords: this was _my_ world. I couldn't just watch it from the side lines, mainly that's why I put on men's clothes.

I fell for the role at once. I defeated them, rumors were spreading about my victories, they were looking up to me and treating me almost like a human. Moreover, I got the title _enemy of everyone_. They were afraid of me and tried to defeat me again without success; and I took delight in their anger and enjoyed the feeling of hearing the rumors that they were beaten by me: by the lanky blonde.

The ladies didn't find me lanky though when I became invincible on the stage of fencing. And my rivals hated that and it was only oil to the flames. But I never had to attain even some flirting to have gossips spread everywhere about my never-existing relationships.

Are you wondering where The Prince, The Knight of Charm Endymion was these days? No…? Of course; sorry if I woke gastric pain and disgust in some of my dearest fans who find him as pathetic as he really seems someday. I don't have a single complaint against you, since mostly you are the part of our fans that remains loyal to my beloved Michiru when it comes to representing my love relations with your own hands. I won't intervene; the main underminer of my misandry probably won't take it to his heart when I don't defend him. Nevertheless, he was the only one among my lining up enemies who, instead of a wild battle cry, wondered my behavior and entirely feminist principles with wide eyes. Sometimes he drove me mad with that, and when I screamed vengeance against him, he responded at most with a short chuckle. At most.

Why, he was an intellectual guy, and so were his four bodyguards too, only with different temperaments. These times Kunzite endeavored to beat me and get back his leadership most often. Until the day when The Man stepped into my story.

And he told me to stop wielding my sword: it's late, he had a long journey and now he wishes to have his rest.

At first I laughed at him but the audience didn't laugh along: they knew him. I had to take a closer look.

His hair was flaming red, slightly darker around his face, his bangs were mostly aiming for the skies. His eyes had the same color as he grinned at me with an endlessly firm haughtiness I have seen neither before nor afterwards. Broad chest, waistcoat of buckskin, round nacreous medallion, deep green trousers, black leather boots. And a gigantic ego.

Have you recognized him? He was called Rubeus. He was a God of Misogyny, inside and out. More people were convinced we ought to walk around hand in hand, some of them suggested locking us up together in a dungeon and the palace will get rid of the two Invincibles by morning. The plan never occurred; no one undertook to make either of us angry.

Because he had no match in this whole Universe either. I had the opportunity to experience it there at our first encounter when I wrested the sword from my permanent enemy's hand a little surprised and challenged the red guy to a duel.

Rubeus nodded and walked closer.

"Shall I give you a weapon?" I asked lifting my right eyebrow but he flung up his arms.

"No. I wish to pound you to ruins with my bare hands. But only if you don't mind, of course."

"I certainly don't." I shrugged, secretly thinking hard about how to attack him with a sharp blade when he has nothing to defend himself with. "I don't know you enough to be shaken by your death."

He chuckled at my words and waited until I attacked. I knew this method, the method of maximum self-confidence since I also used this many times.

He was an impudent creature, dodging my strokes easily and dispensing lightning-fast, long ringing punches. I could kill him with my glare for that. Especially when I faced him a little dizzy after his umpteenth blow thinking about further battle-tricks and he grinned at me saying: "It's enough. I'll let you go exceptionally, but only because you're a man."

"Oh really?" I asked back trying desperately to hide the boiling anger inside me. "Who would think that such a tender soul lives within this bastard? Well now, let _me_ show you what behavior fits a man."

And with these words we were roused to fight again, and we couldn't beat each other, of course, and we couldn't next day, nor later. No other duels could hold a candle to the hatred of our battles because they held our rivality, our dislike for each other, his hate for women and my disgust for any male creatures in themselves. It was war we fought against each other in the morning and at night, on the market and in the palace, on festivals and carnivals, every time we met.

He was the complete byword for every single point of my misandry. The skirmishing with him soon became a condition of my existence, like water, like food, like air.

It never occurred to me that maybe he won't stay here forever. I never thought of what will happen when the condition of my existence stops existing one day.

He hasn't departed yet, only the rumor was spreading about his intention. I laughed with joy when I heard about it, but something deep inside me was screaming for fear.

Maybe it lay also with him but our fights became more pitched than ever. I wanted to kill him so that he can't go away because if I let him go, I'll kill others with my rage, since there is no one else who could easily beat off my deadly strokes. But I couldn't kill him, neither in play nor for real, just like he couldn't kill me.

I didn't dare imagine what I will do when I won't have anyone to vent every bit of my fury on, only to have him create new bits with each of his grins, sarcastic looks and high-hat movements.

The day was approaching. I didn't know its exact date but I suspected it. I also suspected it in that evening when we were fighting in a small back yard of the palace; we could do that since we had the ranks we were allowed to be here with and the servants couldn't stop us fighting even if they had dared.

"Where are you from?" he asked between two breaths when we faced each other for a moment.

"I could ask that, too." I answered springing aside from his fist.

"They say you're a royal child."

"And you're the member of a royal family. And?"

I wasn't happy about his interrogation. I needed my real identity to be revealed the least.

And still I desired nothing more when our lips met above the blade without any former thought. And my wish didn't come true, so I could hate no one but _him_ for that. My blood was screaming for revenge, I bit him back… it was sweet, and scorching; I wanted to hurt him, but he stepped back, his look was foggy as he inspected me, wiped off our blood from his mouth with the back of his hand and then he left me there without a word.

I was not myself on the following days. It was made worse by the fact that I couldn't find him on the streets any more, and maybe my stubborn self-deception did that to me but his absence was hurting inside me more with every minute. I had to realize: he was the One.

I realized it and it required blood, oceans of blood from my more common enemies. Until one day I met the Prince of Earth again while beating off the revolting males. My attackers dispersed immediately and I walked towards him to cut him down in revenge for everything, but he didn't reach for his sword.

"Get off my men." he asked calmly. "If you have rage for something, tell it to me first, we might be able to help you. In other case please continue turning to your most worthy opponent, just to prevent our generation from dying out."

_Let the leprosy prevent it then_, I thought.

"Unfortunately, I have no idea where my most worthy opponent may be hiding lately, my prince." I announced in a sweet voice. "But you perform quite well, too; if you find it acceptable I also don't mind that you take my rage upon yourself."

"Rubeus will take it on himself when you attack him. I'm sure you'll find him at home. Let me guide you to him, in your sake, too."

"Guide me." I sighed putting my sword in its place while my heart gave a huge leap.

I stepped into his residence which was as luxurious as high was his rank. I spent a few minutes wandering around in the rooms until he turned up finally, scaring me out of my senses as he shouted at me from behind, asking about the bloody reason of my visit.

When the horrible moment was over, he examined me carefully as I turned towards him, and then he kissed me or I kissed him, I never knew for sure. He held me like we hadn't met for about a lifetime. But suddenly I heard the last warning screams of my obscuring mind and my limbs pushed him away from me obediently at the moment I realized that I was playing someone I'm not. I didn't like it but I had to tell him. I couldn't live with this any longer. Only a tiny part of my heart was implying: don't throw him away from you, it'll kill you anyway, deceive him until you can…

"We came from the future." he said quietly, devoting most of his attention to the window he turned towards after this small grief moments ago. "My family spent its life on traveling. I met thousands of people but I've never… never met someone like you."

"No." I nodded, meaning the bitterness in my voice mostly for myself while the slight fear slowly extended down to my stomach. He confessed his feelings for me, now it was my turn. Great.

"Don't leave." I asked; the uttering of these few words was too hard for me to say anything more. Maybe I wasn't able to hide my emotions from it because his gaze turned towards me again; his eyes seemed to glow in the stripe of sunshine emerging through the window as he bent closer to me.

This was my only gentle kiss from him, in a careful way that makes your blood boil; I could break anything just thinking of it every time I remember. I reached after its taste eagerly, I felt his bangs between my fingers, but I went too far again so I stepped back and gathering the remaining peaces of my common sense I stammered him my secret in the company of some explanation.

He didn't get it for a few minutes but I understood. After the astonished silence died down, he stepped towards me and reached for my shirt. He was even scandalized when his wrist left its former way in a wide curve because of my waking self-respect.

I wondered the change in his look and voice while I was fending off his further tries. A fight started between us, but not the usual battle because it was something else now, something much more horrible.

He was chasing me so to speak and I was trying to escape, realizing that my sword is not his old opponent any more, especially not worthy. I didn't have the courage to find out if it lay with him or with me or maybe with both of us but I didn't have time for that either, he was too fast and more furious than ever before. He filled the spaces between the "_Get out!_"s with words that were coarse and not at all true, and exactly that's why I couldn't understand why each of them burned inside me with excruciating pains. I remember nothing of what I shouted back, only the throbbing of blood in my head and the pain in my throat.

Getting out of there I rushed straight home, although I seem to remember to cut down a few fault-finders on my way but throwing myself onto my bed I immediately lost all my energies. I spent the night laying on my back and sobbing while swearing ninety-seven times: never again, to no male, with no male, for no male.

I have never thought about it so far but on this noble occasion I appoint this particular night the foulest one of my entire life. There are some other terrible hours rivaling with it, for example when my fate looked promising the death of Usagi, the nice little girl with the purest heart; when I was running for the sake of Michiru the Talisman-keeper; when I sent Pluto to death without batting an eyelid and watched Michiru slowly fade away without her Star Sheed because I invented to pretend being on Galaxia's side. But I guess the darkness of my thoughts couldn't be compared to those that visited me during this one night.

So I was merely happy about the dawn when huge row and shouting and crowd on the streets woke me from my half-awake nightmares. Some minutes after I staggered outside I could fight new faces: demons and bastards and everything you – or at least I – could imagine. Kunzite was leading them; when he caught a sight of me he laughed and challenged me. Why, I would have cut down his hair gladly but my fighter's spirit implied the way to the palace, so I followed it.

I found Endymion there; he was fighting at the head of a handful of soldiers wilder and faster than at any duel I fought with him. The thought that he probably didn't give in everything in the more playful battlefield made me furious; so I watched with slight malicious glee as he shook his head unable to believe when he encountered his favorite general Jadeite. I helped the prince chase him and his monsters temporarily out of the palace. But there were still two more generals somewhere so we had to hurry.

He didn't know what exactly happened either but he wasn't even interested: his most urgent desire was to get to the Moon in a heartbeat. Queen Selene called him and the princesses of the other eight planets to send them to the more peaceful future as protectors of her daughter. _It's nice to know that I also have to go_, I thought but didn't tell him. It seemed we were going to meet there later anyway.

I told him I won't take on his army for the sake of one of his girlfriends but that didn't really matter, in five minutes he was nowhere to be seen. Men – they always remember sorting out their affairs in the worst moments. At this time I was already getting lost in the countless empty rooms of Rubeus and one thing kept on repeating itself in my mind, at first dying away, then quietly, then louder, crying, howling, screaming: he's gone.

He couldn't be too far away, not only because he didn't have much time since our noisy parting but also because I couldn't whisper into his ear at the moment of repelling my sword for the last time: I hate you.

The palace was invaded by monsters in the meantime, his home as well, so I couldn't stay any longer; I left to search for him. After long battles I staggered out to the open air exhausted and covered with blood. Those were almost immortal demons: if they were killed by sword they got up again and laughed at the astonished soldiers around them. Some earthly people had magical powers; they were hunting them down with unremitting zeal.

Rubeus was also one of them. I could see it when a monster covered in armor up to its ears appeared in front of me, and then it collapsed and crumbled in its own blood.

My arm was grasped and I was dragged out of the middle of the war. I jogged obediently into the direction of pulling but soon I had to stop in a monsterless field to examine the huge floating something that reminded mostly of a black crystal at the moment of exploding.

"Come." he said turning to me. I watched his ruby eyes; there was that change from yesterday in it, there it was never ceasing. There was also pain, confusion, fear of the answer and… love perhaps…?

I touched the black moon glittering on his forehead and I didn't need a sixth sense to know it's no good. I didn't care, my heart was pulling towards him, into anything where he is there, so that I can carry on fighting against him.

But I couldn't go with him. Queen Selene called me, I had a duty.

It moved me to tears that he was able to understand it; this was about the first human manifestation of him in my life.

He kissed me, I know he did it this time because I was too busy holding back my tears. He hid his face into my shoulder for a moment… I clung on his neck a little sobbing, I didn't want to let him go but soon he was gone; he was gone…

_I'll find you_, he said turning back halfway towards his vehicle; _we'll meet in the future_. I hoped from the bottom of my heart that he's right, if we have to face each other as enemies, so be it: _that_ won't hold me back from throwing myself into his arms laughing and crying at the same time.

Maybe that's why Fate chose this way for me; that the senshi can't awake in me while he is here, and our passion can't interfere in the Great Battle. Maybe it was really better so… It would surely have been much worse if I had to watch as the dark energy slowly gets over his soul. Maybe it would have been more terrible if I had to watch as my protected princess sends him to death… Maybe that's why Fate chose this way for me.

So be it; although I will never be able to accept it with all my heart, I'll do my best.

Nevertheless, that was my story for today.

Its moral? Well, there isn't any. I am not a wise old man who is distributing morals and lessons about how to live your lives. I have no say in what concerns only yourselves, nor has anyone else, don't forget that. There, I'm already playing the philosopher. This must be a premonitory sign of climax. After all, I and all of my fellow senshi are approaching forty with lightning-speed, only to have our growing up children, the guardians of Chibiusa take our place at protecting the Universe.

We also obtained a tiny tot with Michiru during the 20th century. From an orphanage, to let there be no mistake about it. The red-haired little girl was gazing at the world with huge dark green eyes, with some kind of a hidden sadness in her smile. Her face was the reflection of Michiru's as she bent down to speak to her and it is reflecting her these days too. Her waist-long wavy hair, although not really green, is also an addition to that.

Nikko grew out of her childhood loneliness into a wonderful, slender girl, and in spite of her resemblance to Michiru their personality stands in contrast with each other like reflection with its source. She is the best and fiercest senshi among us all, and sometimes it is quite hard to persuade her to let Sailor Moon's love win the battle without shedding of blood.

At times I deem to recognize myself in her but it's better not reach her ears. We are tormenting her with enough heart-to-heart conversations anyway.

However, my story really ends here. I wonder if I have changed in your eyes. Does a guy have place in the life of your favorite womanizer tomboy Haruka? Make him place. He is making every corner of my heart ache. Except for that one corner where there will always be you, enthusiast lovers of our adventures. I'd like you not to forget us when you'll try to talk your own children out of their latest childish mania with that they lose friends and gain new ones, became dreamy and, finally, school won't be the only meaning of their life.

Keep the child in yourselves until you can, for it will be the only thing you'll feel pure.

With lots of love,

Haruka


End file.
